:(

I have had the worst week ever!! I cant afford to live in halls anymore, so I'm going to move in with my best friends which I know will be so much easier and better for me. But knowing I cant afford to live scares me because what am I going to do?! I miss home so much, its where I feel most happy! I miss my mam so much and I don't think people realise how hard I am finding it because I always put this front on that is always happy. It gets real tough being happy all the time.

Since coming back I haven't been myself, I feel so down that its pretty much affecting everything which is the last thing I want. I feel that there is a distance between me and the group with no fault but my own. I never mean to annoy or upset anybody, its not in my nature to but this week all Ive seemed to have done is do that.

This week has gotten so bad I am actually thinking about giving it all up, leave university and go back home. I am sick to death with feeling this way now, I want things to be like they were before I left. I cry too much and it is slowly getting me down!!

I hope next week will be better, it sure as hell cant get any worse than this week. I just wish I could rewind to the beginning of the week to make sure I never hurt friends feelings. I am sorry.